Today is different. Today I found out that my poppa's cancer has spread all through his body. I wonder why such a bad thing could happen to my poppa. I wonder what bad he ever done. He already fought cancer before. Why did it need to come back? Our family is so out of gear. Besides my dad that passed away before I was born, and a few other distant cousins this is the first really bad thing our family has had to face. Well not for my mom because she lost the love of her life, but now she has to deal with her father dying. I never knew my father i can only imagine how this is going to affect her. I am not to sure how to deal with this. The worst part is that I am thousands of miles away from home. To top it all off, I do not think I will be able to go home. 1 I cant afford it, 2 I have school. I just wanna be home to support my poppa. To comfort my mom and family. Now I finally realize how big of a thing cancer is, how evil it is.
My Poppa D is a hero. He did so many good things in his life so far. Poppa is a member of the Tower Road Fire Department and has been for most of his life. He saved lives and put of so many fires. Why does he have to go through this. I lost one of my best friends before. This is different for some reason. It hurts so bad to see my family hurting, I can hear that sadness in my moms voice when i talk to her on the phone. I just wish I could do something to save my poppa's life. To stop the evil that is taking him away. I sit here now and listen to a song my poppa sung while I was home for Christmas. A warm tear rolls down my face. I am not sad because it is my poppa I am listening to, I am happy because I think back to that day. I was mad when I woke up that day. Went to my aunts for a family supper. Sat by Poppa almost the whole night. He kept complaining about his leg and that he was not feeling good. My uncle asked him to play the accordion. This was a tradition our family loved when poppa would play. That day was different though, poppa said he could not play today. That he was not in the mood. We were all very shocked he would never turn a chance down to play the accordion. So we all went about, chatting, telling stories. A few minutes had passed. Then I decided to go chat with my cousin in the computer room. Talk about old times. Then there it was the music of the accordion. Even though Poppa was very sick that day he still played. Just to make us happy and keep the tradition going. That made me so happy, made my day. Made the warm tear run down my face. I will always have the recording but Id do anything to save my poppa.
Today is January 29th, 2011. At around 2:00 p.m I phoned home to check up on everyone. I am in Quebec so it would be around 3:00 p.m in Nova Scotia. First time i phoned my uncle Jerry told me that my mom and aunt were gone to get their hair done and to phone back in about 1/2 hour. The next time I phoned my uncle informed me that the nurse was in with my poppa. My uncle said "it could be today it could be tommorow" its all for God to decide now. When I hung up the phone I sat here and thought of how painful it must be for my poppa to know he is going to die. Not only painful imagine how scary it would be knowing you are going to die but not knowing exactly when. To be honest if that was me I dont think I would be able to handle it. I am very dissapointed that I cannot find a way home. I am atleast 10 hours away from home to drive and nobody will come and get me. Then agian I dont want to bother them at this time my family I mean. Although it would have been nice for someone to offer, but I am sure that they all want to spend as much time with my poppa as possible. I got to spend at least 10 years of my life seeing him every couple of days, weeks. A tiny bit of me is satisfied because this past christmas I did get to be home for 1 month and got to spend New Years with my mom and poppa. Life can be so un-fair sometimes. I wonder why bad things happen to the good. Shouldnt it be the other way around?.
Today is January 30th, 2011. I was speaking to mom earlier she said that all the fire men were putting on a ceromony for my poppa. Well everyone calls it a bitchin kitchen party down home. Which is 100% true. At these events usually there is food like wings, steak, fries, clams, lobster and of course liqour beverages. Along with music, my poppa usually takes care of that along with a few of his buddies. As i mentioned earlier he plays the accordion and then his buddie plays the harmonica. The last one that I was at was so much fun. This Bitchin kitchen party will be alot different though. Everyone is comming to see my poppa for the last time. They are going to place my poppas accordion in a glass case so that everytime his close friends and family come to the firehall they will be able to remember all the times that my poppa played and it will help them to remember all the fun times that they had with my poppa along with all of the good things that he did. Its around 9:00 p.m here I just got off the phone with mom agian she said that it was a huge turn out for my poppa at the hall. There was more people there then there was for the new years dance. That is only because so many people know my poppa and know how good of a man he is.
